In Retrospect: How Infidelity In Marriage Impacts Marriage And Why It Happens


It can happen very innocently. At the exercise room you can be talking to a person of the opposite sex working out next to you about your spouse and issues you are going through. This person is good looking and listens patiently to all your problems. You keep showing up at the exercise room at the same time week after week to exercise and become friends. He or she suggests going for coffee after the exercises. One thing leads to another and before you know it you are in an extramarital relationship. It was not meant to happen, but it happens.

Similar to a bad moon on the rise, marital infidelity is growing daily, with one or both spouses in around 40% of marriages admitting to having affairs; most are sexual, but a few are simply emotional. More men than women admit to committing marital infidelity at least once in the course of their marriage. The average affair lasts about 2 years. This is one of the major reasons why 53% of all marriages in the USA end up in divorce.

These statistics are surprising when it has been found that 80 percent of Americans say that marital infidelity is wrong. Hence, it's generally not approved of in the USA.

Men normally cheat for one major reason: sex. After children come along in a marriage, some men no longer have a sexual desire for their wives. They consider their wives as maternal figures rather than sexually desirable. Additionally, they find that during marriage, the sex becomes mechanical and routine, lacking the adventure and adrenaline rush they wish. Moreover, an affair boosts their egos, proving they still have what it takes.

Wives, on the other hand, don't normally cheat for sex, but rather for an emotional bond. Sex is secondary, however. Wives often find themselves left out emotionally from their husbands. She is seen as the care giver, the cook and house wife, regardless of her work situation. When she meets a man that sees her as something more, that's usually when the affair begins. Surprisingly, when ladies initiate the affair, it generally lasts 3 times longer than when men initiate it.

When infidelity in marriage occurs, it's a signal there are problems within the marriage. People change, but sometimes spouses don't change at the same rate. Often, one spouse will develop dependence on their partner, not being open to having a life of their own and it'll begin to suffocate the other person.

With all of the outside factors, it's easy to lose sight of what is actually going on within a relationship and before long, there are problems and neither spouse desires to take any blame. The lines of communication break down. Keeping a good marriage going is hard work and most of the people today would rather take the easy way out.

The increasing availability and influence of the Web is making this situation worse with 10% of users reporting they're addicted to sex in cyberspace and other internet enticements. Even though these web affairs do not involve physical contact they can still destroy marriages & relationships.

Sometimes marriages can survive marital infidelity but they're rare and the relationship between the spouses is never the same. There is constant wonder whether it'll happen again. Trust is a vital part of a secure marriage and once that is broken, often times it's irreparable. Communicating with your partner may resolve many of the problems before they get out of control. Marriage is a promise and most people today do not seem ready for that.

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